Goldposts - The best of Punt Road End

[Tigers of Old]

Goldposts

On PRE there's some cracking material (plenty of crap too ;D) this is the thread where it's your chance to highlight a particular quote or passage that you think is worthy of nomination into the 'Goldposts' thread AKA the best of Punt Road End.

Here's some just to wet your appetite and give you an idea. Below is a great goldpost from cagedtiger that inspired this thread..


Richmond Coaching Solution – Staring Tigers in the Face (Article)

Richmond Coaching Solution – Staring Tigers in the Face
17th July 2007

There has been many a coaching dilemma down at Tigerland over the years and even the unflappable and untouchable Terry Wallace must be feeling the pressure with 14 losses from 15 starts. However, it would seem the solution has been staring the Richmond club in the face for many years now. Greg Miller first came up with the suggestion and it would seem to have benefits of being cost effective whilst at the same time draw off what seems like an endless and diverse range of expert opinions.

What is the solution you ask? Well it is an internet Richmond supporter’s forum – known as Punt Road End or PRE for short. It would seem on first sight that PRE is just a rabble of supporters who have inflated views of their football acumen – but don’t be fooled by their lack of experience playing or coaching the game – these people really know their football from years of watching the football from their couch or attending the game or even just keeping up with all things football in the media.

"Clearly, we need to utilise this resource to get more skill and structure into our club" Miller said.

"What we will be looking at doing is setting up a big plasma screen down at the training track with a web cam and the like and have the PRE knowledge base provide their training tips and drills directly via the internet. This is innovative stuff”

“I know we may get mixed messages given the variety of coaching avatars that will be giving instructions – however in the end we will just go with the ones that repeat themselves over and over again the most or the ones who constantly use capital letters” Miller said.

Wallace had some very flattering comments as well, “I have to admit when Greg came to me with the idea I thought he was just angry because his role has been diluted recently. However, I amused Greg and checked the PRE thing out. I was amazed – so much so I trialled using PRE to help my match day coaching against Melbourne. Who would have believed we won for the first time this year.”

“What I like about PRE was the free way they call a spade a spade. I never had heard of the word ‘Dud’, ‘Spin’, ‘Terry Tan’ before. It really was eye opening.” Wallace said.

“Though it is a complex game the type of players Richmond need is quite simple to win the big one.” a PRE representative said.

“It comes down to having 22 players who are between 6’4- 6’6”, run like the wind, strong bodied (95-105kg), exquisite skills, ultra fit, sticky handed, natural leaders, injury resistant, can kick 70 metres left and right foot and are extroverts.”

“And we need them right now from somewhere wherever because we have no time to wait. As for the salary cap thingy, well that’s for the finance guys to worry about.” a PRE representative said

“It is ideas like these are refreshing – I’ve really always thought undersized malnourished players were the way to go.” Wallace said.

“We envisage PRE should be able to take on the full time coaching role from the start of 2008. With Terry we will continue him on in the role somewhere – maybe network administrator or the like of that.” Miller said

“We will definitely be looking to PRE on Thursday afternoon during the selections now and making sure we know who the duds are, who is too skinny or who should just get a go because they are the flavour of the month." Miller said

"There will certainly be a group of senior players and slow to develop 20 year olds who will be relegated to the football trash heap” a PRE representative said.

http://www.puntroadend.com/yabbse/index.php?topic=28133.msg607023#msg607023

If you are going to contribute it's probably a good idea to mention the thread title and then the quote and a link.
Not sure if this is going to work but if you see something someone's posted and you'd like to share it then put it in here.
The idea is just to have so fun.

Go for it.

 

[Stripes]

Great thread ToO!!! :clap

Cagedtiger is going to be hard to top, but I must say this is one of my all time favourite PRE threads.

http://www.puntroadend.com/yabbse/index.php?topic=22758.0

 

[Tigerfan]

I trust that some of you are familiar with the expression 'the shot that was heard around the world' referring to the first shot fired at the English to commence conflict in the American Revolution.

Following is Phantom's post which first mooted the idea of a petition to force an extraordinairy AGM. This idea led to action which IMHO was critical to the subsequent changes at board and coaching level.

No 'best of PRE' is complete without this one, IMO.

10612   FOOTBALL / DYER-TRIBE / Re: A Radical Idea  on: May 28, 2004, 10:33:50 am  
Hi Everone,
I work in a large office in Port Melbourne. If you want to have a meeting here one evening, or on a weekend I can volunteer my office. Only too happy to help.
I suggest that we might get to work devising a petition or the like. Get onto SEN and tell Richmond members about the petition being available at one of our next home games. Then when they sign we can give them a leaflet advertising a larger member wide meeting again either here or at another location.
If you're interested you can call me.
I hope this helps.

 

[Liverpool]

Surely everything I have ever posted is 'golden'.... :hihi

 

[RemoteTiger]

Surely everything I have ever posted is 'golden'.... :hihi

Mate I feel the same about my posts too -

But then some wag gave me a back handed comment about "Self praise is no accolade!" - I don't think its a compliment?

 

[Hungry]

Who could forget the thread "Frawley lovers I want a response!!!!"

Or "Which dud is going to kick five goals against us this week?" (actually, we should bring that one back)

:hihi

 

[JR8]

Who could forget the thread "Frawley lovers I want a response!!!!"

Or "Which dud is going to kick five goals against us this week?" (actually, we should bring that one back)

:hihi

Yeah but this isnt about golden "threads" its about golden "posts".

 

[JR8]

Here's one from Atha Klasso:

Right now I am gutted
Terry talking up Tambling aka Marty McGrath and the guy gets 1 kick. His career will be going the same way as Marty McGrahs too.
We lose by 53 points
Roughead 5 gls Franklin 4 gls there's your diff b/ween 2 sides
Deledio excused as he was injured and has played some great footy this
year.
No wonder Terry was savage in last nights post match press conference
Chefs at Punt Rd Social Club had prepared for him and Greg Miller a huge
tray of humble pie
for them to chew on with second helpings of course.
Until Roughhead and Franklin retire it will become a tradition at Punt Rd
the eating of Humble Pie after Hawk matches
or until he quits or loses his job. Hopkinsville Goblin has alot to answer
to.
Look of resignation on my face and my mates faces was palpable. That 2nd half was
as worse as the whole Geelong game earlier in the year
No skill no passion no heart no desire no pride absolutely nothing just an
inept inadequacy in skill and decision making
and a derision of being in the position they are. Heads must roll and so
must reputations the club has to wholehaeartedly commit to a youth
policy and make hard decisions and tread on toes before we even think
about climbing the ladder. Even getting rid of Richo to full time blood
a youngster who will be our backbone for the next 10-12 years. Otherwise
Terry's 2011 prediction will be just another token finals appearance
much in the same guise as 2001 with the same heart wrenching results with
the same sort of calamitous issues.
Tiges are gawn absolutely the worst club with the least light at the end
of the tunnel of all wooden spooners in the last 25 years.
The apparent lack of success and poor decision making in the board room in
the coaches box and on game day on the ground has left me gutted
as a supporter and the pain will only get worse with no indication of a
time frame of when it will get better.
Thank you Helen D'Amico
Thank you Geoff Raines Bryan Wood for defecting after 82 grannie
Thank you Pres Ian Wilson and Barry Richardson for their personal agendas,
club infighting and dwindling club finances stature and respect
Thank you to the morons who appointed Alan Bond as pres for 1 yr and he
made 1 trip to the club in that time
Thank you Kevin Bartlett hope your satisfied with your dummy spit at the club and
continual resignation and failure to move on and hope the AFL and Sen have you on their honour roll.
Thank you for SOS in 1990 and we all going out of our way to raise 1 million to help keep the club afloat only for subsequent administrations to go down a similar path and get similar end of season results as circa 1990.
Thank you Leon Daphne and Jim Malone for only offering John Northey a 1 yr
contact extension after he led us to the finals in 1995 who promptly quit
and we then get Walls for 3 years only to sack him within 2
Thank you for the Giesche bet he tells the umps now give the tigs all the
frees you can they need it
Thank you for 5 years of Frawley no progress except knowing how to answer
like a rabbit in the headlights starting his response with"yeah nah" going onto "stick fat" in the middle of his response

and finishing with "cherry ripes" at the end and still not answering the
question. Please I ate so many cherry ripes thanks to Danny in 02 03 and 04 I am now a grade 2 diabetic.
Thank you for Clinton Casey for pillaging the club finances once again
Thank you for Greg Miller for being the marshmallow Sheeds actually called
you. Please channel 7 bring the Hammerheads back so he can go there.
Thank you Terry aka Hopkinsville Goblin for talking the talk and not
walking the walk and forcing every true tiger to eat humble pie like you
and your mate marshmallow man.
Thank you Terry for coming as the Messiah and presiding like a child molesting priest taking advantage of those who were at your need mercy and help. On judgement day Jesus will punish you for impersonating him. Maybe your next job Terry could be one impersonating one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Thank you for all the memories for 95% of them were bad
Thank you for all the scattered history and pain and sorrow you have all caused since 1983.
Thank you for reaffirming my belief that we were once the most feared and
respected predator in the afl jungle
Thank you to all the clappers clapping them off you have all contributed
in your own unique way to make the Richmond Footy Club on match day
the best it can be and the future just holds so many more ambitions and
years of unparalled and unbridled has beens broken dreams and gut
wrenching
days such as yesterday.
To all involved from from half time onwards in the 1982 Grand Final on the
25th of September 1982 a big big thank you for the way I feel and for the
way I have felt and for forcing me to be the butt of mates jokes as well
as the pain of having to endure absolute reckless uninspired and utter
garbage similar to yesterday for the last 25 years.
Thank you to the guy who dropped manure on the club after their round 9
loss to Geelong in 2001 when he clearly should have brought Father Dimi
from "The Exorcist" to come and exorcise the demons the curse the Kavorka
that has presided over the dense thick and blackest clouds in existence
over Punt Rd.
Thank you for rendering my pain now immune and my love for you a mere
pinprint on my soul.
Thank you for the guy who went bezerk on Danny Frawley after round 4 2004 and went to the footy show. If you were loaded and appeared in a suit you could have been our next president as you had the right intentions about the club but went about the wrong way hence the media lapped it up and made fun of it by giving the non plussed and unimpressed footy public "There go the tigers eating their own again".
Once again thanks to all I have mentioned and apologies to those that I
have neglected to mention. Thank you for making the AFL an easier
competition to be in and having heritage round every week with the theme
of the 90's as there are 15 teams who have a bye each time they play us just like in 91-94 when the Crows were the 15th side.
Thank you In Anger Frustration Pain Sorrow Indignance Derision Suffering
Yours sincerley
Life long Richmond supporter born 1974 a premiership year.

 

[Tigers of Old]

The Catters are a pretty slick looking machine. I'd love to go and see that kind of football every week.

We do, it is played by our opponents every week.

 

[TOT70]

Wear a Tigers scarf DDT,we owe them for Helen Dimedenco-however u spell it

D'Amico

3 beards.

:hihi

Excellent effect, Oldie. Made me chuckle!

 

[jackfrost]

Maybe not so relevant for those that don't follow Golf , but for those of us who know a bit about Aaron Baddeley and his strong religious belief's ..................This qualifies !
Had me rollin' for quite sometime.


Quote from: hutstar on June 17, 2007, 07:22:43 pm
New York Times
6/17/07

Baddeley: "God @#$#@ed me over, He can suck my #$%".
In a surprising outburst, young Aussie golfer Aaron Baddeley has said that the Lord has forsaken his usually smooth putting stroke and thus must be held accountable for Baddeley's poor final round in the U.S. Open today.
"I have had the Almighty to thank for a lot in my life, but today he just sucked", the usually affable young man said.
"I guess Angel just is more more religious than I am, or maybe that new position my wife and I tried with the toaster didn't go down too well", he continued.
"Either way, God owes me one big time. I give him all the credit in the world, pray my guts out and ramble on to anyone within earshot about what a great Divine Entity the Lord is, and this is what I get in return. Well, God can suck my #@$".

Baddeley went on to say that he was surprised that the Lord would do this to him and that He must be held accountable if He wants all the praise when things go right.
"I mean, it's God this and the Almighty that- it even hurts me to go on like a twit sometimes, but that is the sacrifice I make for Jesus. Well, not any more. Jesus can get his own $#%#$% PR from now on".
"I am going to check out this Allah dude, but I don't know about that either. I can't see how I could pray without either getting my pants stained or a two shot penalty".

 

[The_General]

This month we jumped the shark.

Wallace and Miller can no longer just thump the jukebox and expect us all to go wild with excitement.

I think this needs to be added. It marks the month where even the most optimistic (maybe naive?) supporter would have had their eyes opened widely that things aren't all sunbeams and lollipops at punt road.

 

[Freezer]

Maybe not so relevant for those that don't follow Golf , but for those of us who know a bit about Aaron Baddeley and his strong religious belief's ..................This qualifies !
Had me rollin' for quite sometime.


Quote from: hutstar on June 17, 2007, 07:22:43 pm
New York Times
6/17/07

Baddeley: "God @#$#@ed me over, He can suck my #$%".
In a surprising outburst, young Aussie golfer Aaron Baddeley has said that the Lord has forsaken his usually smooth putting stroke and thus must be held accountable for Baddeley's poor final round in the U.S. Open today.
"I have had the Almighty to thank for a lot in my life, but today he just sucked", the usually affable young man said.
"I guess Angel just is more more religious than I am, or maybe that new position my wife and I tried with the toaster didn't go down too well", he continued.
"Either way, God owes me one big time. I give him all the credit in the world, pray my guts out and ramble on to anyone within earshot about what a great Divine Entity the Lord is, and this is what I get in return. Well, God can suck my #@$".

Baddeley went on to say that he was surprised that the Lord would do this to him and that He must be held accountable if He wants all the praise when things go right.
"I mean, it's God this and the Almighty that- it even hurts me to go on like a twit sometimes, but that is the sacrifice I make for Jesus. Well, not any more. Jesus can get his own $#%#$% PR from now on".
"I am going to check out this Allah dude, but I don't know about that either. I can't see how I could pray without either getting my pants stained or a two shot penalty".

This was hilarious. Was laughing my head off when I read it.

"God can suck my #@$". "

 

[Tony Braxton-Hicks]

This month we jumped the shark.

Wallace and Miller can no longer just thump the jukebox and expect us all to go wild with excitement.

I think this needs to be added. It marks the month where even the most optimistic (maybe naive?) supporter would have had their eyes opened widely that things aren't all sunbeams and lollipops at punt road.

I'm not sure whether to be happy about making Goldposts or upset about being named "the most optimistic (maybe naive?) supporter". :don't know

 

[Crazy Costanza]

great

 

[Tigers of Old]

A very clever entry from T74 & Elmer this week.

I hope we get it right this time, but if you walk past Punt Road when its quiet I swear you hear Miller chanting "monorail, monorail, monorail"

To the theme of monorail:

GM: Well, sir, there's nothing on earth
Like a genuine,
Bona fide,
Electrified,
Five-year plan!
What'd I say?
TW: Five year plan!
GM: What's it called?
Richo+Browny: Five year plan?!
TW+GM: That's right! Five year plan

[crowd chants `Five-year plan’ softly and rhythmically]

Redford: I hear those things are awfully suspect...
TW: We’ll stay the course and end up perfect
GPB: Is there a chance the graph could bend?
TW: Not on your life, my pretty friend.
Bling: What about us skinny kids?
TW: We'll play you anyway next to Lids
Craig: Were you sent here by the devil?
GM: No, good sir, I'm on the level.
Leysy: The ring came off Leysy’s VB can.
TW: Take my stubby, my good man.
I swear it's Richmond's only choice...
Throw up your hands and raise your voice!
All: Five year plan!
GM: What's it called?
All: Five year plan!
TW: Once again...
All: Five year plan!
Claw: But Petts and Bling are still soft and token...
Harry: Sorry, Claw, the duds have spoken!
All: Five-year plan!
Five-year plan!
[big finish]
Five-year plan!!
Craig: Five…..D’uds!

http://www.puntroadend.com/yabbse/index.php?topic=28061.new#new


:cutelaugh Excellent.

 

[Tigers of Old]

..and this one from Redwarf re Wallace.. ;D

He'll turn into a sultana if he keeps cooking himself the way he does. His neck already looks like a giant piece of KFC.

 

[skiptomystu]

Elmer, that is quite possibly the funniest thing I have ever read  :hihi

Literally laughed out loud.

 

[LeeToRainesToRoach]

A very clever entry from T74 & Elmer this week.

I hope we get it right this time, but if you walk past Punt Road when its quiet I swear you hear Miller chanting "monorail, monorail, monorail"

To the theme of monorail:
...

Brilliant!  :hihi

 

[Tiger74]

nice working the tag team with you Fuddy :clap