From www.puntroad.com/content
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Richmond 2003 Best and Fairest of Them All Mark Coughlan is progressing ahead of schedule in his battle with Osteitis Pubis thanks in no small measure to the garden shed staple WD40. Cog's is understood to be receiving hourly treatment of the wonder lubricant/cleaner/protectant in an all out effort to get the young midfielder back on the park for the second half of season 2004.
Richmond Club Doctor Brian Lipless confirmed the unusual treatment had only recently been started."Look I was having a beer with the Club Janitor Reggie O'Green and he asked me what was the deal with Cogs. I explained that there was some rubbing and grinding in his pubic area and he grinned and chuckled in a very alarming manner. Then he said it - 'Have you tried WD40?'. Genius. The only problem for us is how to apply it."
The club experimented with several methods from full immersion at the Ararat Sheep Dip Facility though to setting Coughlan up in some birthing stirups at the Royal Women's and applying directly with a spray gun and hose.
"Yeah look, Cog's arked up a bit at that. Wanted to know why we couldn't just use a pill or a cream. But the sheer volume of the stuff we need to get down there on to his pubic bone precluded those methods. Finally, we settled on letting Mark do it himself. We give him a few moments on his own and he is very professional about it. He doesn't seem to mind self-application and it also let me sack the Club Vet."
Insiders at Richmond say that Coughlan is progressing well, and he is now able to swivel his hips and pubic area through 273°. This is a wonderful development for those interested in Marks' off-the-field, on-the-tool activities.
"Yeah this could really help Mark's ability in the sack. That's just one of the many added bonuses. If this is as successful as results so far indicate, then Mark'll have a much longer line up for more than just signatures at the next Family Day."
"Thank Christ for WD40. Is there nothing it can't do?"
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Richmond 2003 Best and Fairest of Them All Mark Coughlan is progressing ahead of schedule in his battle with Osteitis Pubis thanks in no small measure to the garden shed staple WD40. Cog's is understood to be receiving hourly treatment of the wonder lubricant/cleaner/protectant in an all out effort to get the young midfielder back on the park for the second half of season 2004.
Richmond Club Doctor Brian Lipless confirmed the unusual treatment had only recently been started."Look I was having a beer with the Club Janitor Reggie O'Green and he asked me what was the deal with Cogs. I explained that there was some rubbing and grinding in his pubic area and he grinned and chuckled in a very alarming manner. Then he said it - 'Have you tried WD40?'. Genius. The only problem for us is how to apply it."
The club experimented with several methods from full immersion at the Ararat Sheep Dip Facility though to setting Coughlan up in some birthing stirups at the Royal Women's and applying directly with a spray gun and hose.
"Yeah look, Cog's arked up a bit at that. Wanted to know why we couldn't just use a pill or a cream. But the sheer volume of the stuff we need to get down there on to his pubic bone precluded those methods. Finally, we settled on letting Mark do it himself. We give him a few moments on his own and he is very professional about it. He doesn't seem to mind self-application and it also let me sack the Club Vet."
Insiders at Richmond say that Coughlan is progressing well, and he is now able to swivel his hips and pubic area through 273°. This is a wonderful development for those interested in Marks' off-the-field, on-the-tool activities.
"Yeah this could really help Mark's ability in the sack. That's just one of the many added bonuses. If this is as successful as results so far indicate, then Mark'll have a much longer line up for more than just signatures at the next Family Day."
"Thank Christ for WD40. Is there nothing it can't do?"
